APH: The American Way

Comments make my day! So I'd love it if you'd spare a sec or two!

Read LEFT to RIGHT.

Ohhhmygawed I tried so hard I started this five months ago and then never finished it and I tried so hard I'm so sorry I tried at least I finished it oh the painnnn.

*cough* Anyways.

Inspired by a conversation I had with my brother about a year ago over the holy grail of elk burgers. Minus the gagging in the midst of perfectly well-adjusted customers, of course. America is why we can't have nice things. England is wondering where he went wrong.

I love how Canada just doesn't care anymore. So, no one will acknowledge me? Okey, cool. So I'll just steal America's fries. And makes faces at security cameras. And let Kumajirou loose in Wal-Mart. And make a fool out of my dysfunctional family, because there's no embarrassment in my association because one cannot be associated with anyone if one is invisible. And yes, America, this is your drink I have. I had them change it to root beer when you weren't paying attention.

Script because scanner and handwriting:

F: 'Onestly, your portions never cease to amaze me, Alfred.
A: That's 'cause you frogs eat like little girls. I mean, in order to eat this burger, you need...

A: A SUPER-EPIC WAR ROOM BATTLE PLAN

E: Or you could just cut it in half.
A: But that would be wimping out! That'd be European.
(F: Oi! I am offended.)
(C: S'true, Papa.)
A: This calls for--

A: THE AMERICAN WAY
C: You know, if you were a real man, you'd eat that in one bite.

A: MMPGAHMPH
E: That's just great, Matthew. Yet another place we can never show our faces at again.
C: Don't worry, his gag reflex will kick in soon. Eat your "chips", Iggy.
E: Don't do that.
C: Eh.
(F: Alfred, zat vas a perfectly good tablecloth!!)

hetalia (c) -sensei